One piece, Three looks: Uniqlo broadcloth check shirt

Look 1:  Floral jacket, Zara. Checked shirt, Uniqlo. Fluffy skirt, Topshop. Scrunched Navy Pencil Skirt, H&M. Python pumps, Alexandre Birman. Watch, GUESS Rose-gold. Clutch, Chanel

Look 2: Moto-jacket raincoat, H&M Trend. Checked shirt, Uniqlo. Shirt as skirt, vintage via Beyond Retro. Platform Booties, Chloe Sevigny x Opening Ceremony. Bag, Topshop

Look 3: Candy Bag, Furla. Clear pumps, Chloe. Check skirt, Paul & Joe Sister

Yup, it’s that time of the month and I have here for you three dodgy ways to wear a picnic blanket (Uniqlo broadcloth check shirt). In fact it’s so perfectly gingham that if ever we play hide and seek in the park I promise you’ll never know where to find me while all that time I’ll have been right under your nose scrunched up next to the lemonade and sandwiches. What can I say, one of my many talents.

Coat – ASOS White, Cashmere Dress – Arelalizza, Shoes – Zara, Bag – Warehouse, Cuffs – H&M;

As acting president of the Meh! club I don’t even have to tell you what I feel about Valentine’s day, but if you’re really eager to find out dial 080C-YNI-CISM and my secretary will be happy to fill you in on that while chewing loudly on stale gum. At no stage during school was I ever Glen Coco of the class and when I was finally rid of my braces and the dandelion weed under my armpits I then promptly acquired a geek boyfriend who brought me flowers every single day and 6 years later I ended up marrying him. So this card design collaboration with Beyond Retro (along with Bip Ling, Mademoiselle Robot and Fashion Editor At Large) is really for some kitsch fun, and of course a little contribution to the

British Heart Foundation (£1 of all sales will be donated). So next time you’re in don’t forget to pick one up – I sent one to my baby brother last week and he claims he’s still picking up glitter hearts from his keyboard, everytime loving me just a tiny bit less…

BTW, could anyone recommend a tailor in London? The Aquascutum coat I picked up is all great except the 80’s power shoulders. I got rid of the pads but it still makes me look like I attacked the wrong end my my mummy’s closet. Help!

Bag – WWA courtesy of Olive Shoppe, Shoes – Beyond Retro, Pants – H! by Henry Holland for Debenhams, Sweater – Courtesy of Maska, Shirt – Courtesy of Motel Rocks, Watch – Casio

It’s really comforting to know that while the other side of the world is raising the roof with fabtastic (ick word) glam (ICK) parties and exclusive fashion affairs, I can pull out my favourite granny sweater and some gold pumps and head out for church and tea with friends.
At this pace once the offsprings start popping out this place will quickly mellow into a mommy blog and you’ll start hearing about how I discipline my children with a newspaper roll and that February is the month for vaccines. Hopefully by then the era of affluent, celebrity bloggers will have been a chapter long chewed off by my teething kiddies! Ah just wishful thinking – it’s just so comforting not to want to live in someone else’s shoes, or stilettos what have you. Actually I was listening to ‘Part of Your World‘ from Little Mermaid the other day (routine Disney fix) and that bit where Ariel goes I have this this and that… but I want more reminded me of this whole blogger popularity issue – you just can never have enough even if you’re blessed with so much. Maybe I need to start devising an exit plan – but not one that looks like an infant, not yet at least. Unless it’s a dolphin infant…

Thank you Leonie & Ellen for the photos!