I've moved on...
...to a different domain. Why, what were you thinking? The truth is, I just woke up one day and decided it's time for a change—a metamorphosis, if you will; or, in layman's terms, if Britney can shave her head, then maybe so can I? Nevertheless, it's been a rather handsome 10 years of talking to you, and thank you for putting up with all my moodswings and terrible dad jokes. Fear not! The hormonal imbalance and jokes are more terrible on CUBICLE, see you there.

Biżuteria (Jewellery) Yes calendar launch party, Warsaw; Shoes – United Nude

A presstrip to my home town, why finally! It was the idea of rocking up at the party in my own wheels (also acts as portable changing room) (also not really mine) and accommodation at a 10-star hotel with my mother as maitre d’ that made me think it’d surely be a unicorn-magical trip. Well. Breakfast in bed is quite literally breakfast in bed when the porter (slash maitre d’ slash CEO of Park family) shoves a banana under your pillow and requests I make a snap decision whether the towels go in the bathtub or back on the rails because it’s laundry day. Of course, there’s nothing snappy about said decision because I’ve been milking her Wi-fi till 4 in the morning and I might as well be holding a full-on conversation with a gargling orc under the covers. The Polish star jewellery company Yes, held a 2012 calendar launch party and kindly extended an invitation,  to which I said UH YES? clearly. The evening was generally me squeezing through a throng of beautiful strangers to get to the cake and then squeezing back to get some apple juice (rocking up in own wheels meant I was also my own designated driver) and then back again to get another slice. Until I found Alice & Magda at which point we found a staircase with rails covered with fur and decided that was where the party was. If it weren’t for my killer United Nude heels – by killer I mean one stumble and one foot jabs a London Olympics 2012 logo-lookalike wooden edge into my calf – I believe I would’ve stroked those rails bare while making friends with the entire guestlist for the rest of the night.

Thank you Yes for the invitation, and thank you mother for the spotty banana.